F U N N Y J O K E S

DECENT JOKES Make yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and know someone.... N A U G H T Y S M S A girl phoned me the other day and said…”Come on over,there’s nobody home. ” I went over. Nobody....... L O V E S M S Love is a divine feeling Love is a divine feeling Butwhen u lost love u r lost love is the strongest intangiblething..... BOLLYWOOD JOKES Munna Bhai & Circuit Jokes Aik admi apni biwi ko dafna kay gharja raha tha kayachanak bijli..... MISS YOU SMS My eyes R hurting coz I can't C U, My arms R empty coz I can't hold U, My lips R cold coz I can't kiss U ...... EROTIC JOKES What is the dumbest part on a man's body? The penis. It has a head with no brain, it hangs out with two nuts and... BIRTHDAY TEXT A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day Journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. POLITICAL JOKES Democrat's Concession The election is over the results ar...

A lonely frog, desparate for any form of company telephoned the Psychic Hotline to find out what his future has in store. His Personal Psychic Advisor advises him, “You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you.” The frog is thrilled and says, “This is great! Where will I meet her, at work, at a party?” “No” says the psychic, “in a Biology class.”

A man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner points to three identical looking parrots on a perch and says, “the parrot on the left costs 500 dollars”. “Why does the parrot cost so much,” asks the man. The shop owner says, “well, the parrot knows how to use a computer”. The man then asks about the next parrot to be told that this one costs 1,000 dollars because it can do everything the other parrot can do plus it knows how to use the UNIX operating system. Naturally, the increasingly startled man asks about the third parrot to be told that it costs 2,000 dollars. Needless to say this begs the question, “What can it do?” To which the shop owner replies, “to be honest I have never seen it do a thing, but the other two call him boss!”

The reward for a job well done is more work. Smart man + smart woman = romance. Smart man + dumb woman = pregnancy. Dumb man + smart woman = affair. Dumb man + dumb woman = marriage. Smart boss + smart employee = profit. Smart boss + dumb employee = production. Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion. Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime.

There once was a baby elephant and a baby turtle drinking from a river deep in the jungle. For no reason, the turtle reaches over and bites the elephant’s tail, really hard. Years and years later, the same elephant, now grown up, is by the same river, having a drink with his giraffe buddy, when the same turtle that bit him on the tail all those years ago wanders up to the river. The elephant rears back a leg and kicks the turtle as hard as he can, sending him flying way off into the jungle. “Why did you do that?” the giraffe asks. “When we both were babies, that turtle bit my tail for no reason,” the elephant replied. “Wow! You must have a good memory!” exclaimed the giraffe. “Yep!” said the elephant. “I’ve got Turtle-Recall.”